I AM FILLED!

Well, I am definitely filled to overflowing:

-We spent a week at a family church camp we have gone to for the past 7 summers. The focus was on resting in God - in his promises, his provision, and our position in him. I always come home so filled with His word and His presence, that I am overwhelmed with trying to fit back in the realities and responsibilities of everday life. I would much rather sit at His feet and soak in His word. It makes me long for eternity with Him ...

-Kevin and I had a great date night on Friday night. We had great conversation about what God had spoken to us at camp, our hopes and dreams for our family, our upcoming adoption. It feels so good to be on the same page spiritually and emotionally. I am so blessed to be married to the greatest guy and best dad in the entire world.

-We had a picnic yesterday with a number of families from Central Illinois who have or are in the process of adopting from Ethiopia. What a delight to be in the midst of 20+ little Ethio-American children running all around. They are some of the most beautiful children I have ever seen. I could just melt looking into their eyes and faces, and it's all I can do to keep from stroking their hair. Getting to hear the story of so many other families was so encouraging and exciting.

-Last night we met with some fellow believers to pray over our dear friends the Sanders who are leaving for China tomorrow to pick up their newest daughter Zoe. My heart was so full of love for this precious little girl and for the joy of having incredible friends walking the journey of life and adoption with us. (BTW if you want to follow their journey their blog is http://www.babyjellybeans.com/web/do/site/photo?ID=360525)

Even in the midst of being so filled, my flesh has a tendency to look to those around me and think "God, why doesn't my story look like theirs? Why is our adoption going to be a 2 year plus journey? Why are you calling us to this incredible responsibility of nuturing and loving more children?" But He is gracious and quick to remind me that our journey is the one He planned for us alone.

In the Old Testament, the Korahites were in charge of caring for the temple instruments. They had to stay in the outer courts and weren't allowed to go in to the sanctury to view the holy things or they would die. They began to grumble about wanting the job of the clans who were allowed to go into the sanctuary. And so God wiped out their clan. Later you see that He has redeemed a remnant of their clan and in Psalm 84:10 they sing "Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere." They realize the need to be satisfied with the calling God has for THEIR lives, even if it means staying in the outer courts of the temple and not being allowed in the inner sanctuary.

And so I remind myself, that I am so delighted with the calling God has placed on MY life, even if it looks different from those around me. Even if it means my adoption journey will be 2 1/2 years instead of less than a year. Even if it means I have a season or two ahead of me that will involve sleepness nights and emotional exhaustion. Even if it means I will still have children at home when I am 65 and those around me are enjoying retirement. Lord thank you in advance for all that you are teaching me and preparing me for in this journey you have called me to walk. May I do it with graciousness and humbleness. And may you be magnified through it all!

LORD, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure.
The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.
I have set the LORD always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure,
because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay.
You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. - Psalm 16:5-11